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Dump the dating Rule Book!

Updated: Aug 9, 2023

The concept of finding true love and happily ever after has crossed many of our wandering minds. Our realities on the other hand, never mirror such concept and we are left with bits and pieces of what could’ve been.

Picture this: she is a fairly attractive, scratch that, she absolutely gorgeous!  She’s fun, witty, fluent in sarcasm, an avid reader, dresses well, educated and yes, gainfully employed. She sounds like a girl you know or met, she could even be you.  So, why are we talking about her? She’s single and searching for her “prince charming”.  In her head, he works hard, he’s smart, and quite the eye candy and his entire profile dispel all the ongoing stereotypes about men, especially black men.There are plenty that fits that profile and yes, very single.

Naturally, highlighting all the good qualities for presentation purposes takes precedence.  There is a need to paint the absolute best picture of your life;a Picasso of your experiences, all the lines and colors and landscapes are just remarkable. The ongoing conversations helps to establish that beautiful rapport—setting the stage. Then he does something that totally irks her nerves? She says something that immediately becomes an issue. She consults her rule book and he does the same. But, why all the rules?

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He shouldn’t do this or is expected to do that. She should have this and should be able to do that. Really? Where do the rules end? At what point do we decide to just let it happen? The men are from Mars and women are from Venus concept is a little old. Yes, we have very stark differences—definite facts. However we should always try use those differences to find common ground. You know, the compromise.The “I will try to understand your perspective and respect it” part.  Forget the rules. Dump the rule book!

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